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And We Thought The Balloon Dad Was Weird

October 24, 2009

In “Sometimes Love Can Really Mess You Up” news:

Meet Arthur David Horn.  Arthur, up until he met his lovely bride Lynette, was a Ph.D from Yale, a tenured professor at Colorado State University, and a staunch Darwinist.  He taught a mainstream course in human evolution.  He was a man of science.

Why?  Do I look crazy?

Why? Do I look crazy?

Then he met and fell in love with Lynette, who describes herself with a perfectly straight face as a Metaphysical Healer.   After spending a “revelatory” week with Lynette in the Trinity Mountains of Northern California “looking for Sasquatch” — I’m betting that’s a euphemism on at least two different levels —  Arthur returned to Colorado claiming that the true origin of modern man is NOT a series of Darwinian evolutionary processes.

It is, he claims, the result of a breeding program instituted by a race of shape-shifting, lizard overlords intent on making us their slaves.   Sounds to me like fun was had by all during that week up in the mountains.

In a move that I’m sure was warmly received by a relieved CSU faculty, Dr. Horn resigned from his post and now spends some of his time speaking at conventions such as the “Galactic Gathering”, sponsored by the Institute for  the Study of Galactic Civilizations, a UFO research group.  These conventions apparently draw a large crowd and are seen by the metaphysical community as being both scientific and relevant on the grounds that they are held in the ballroom of an official Doubletree Motel.

“It’s not like a couple of yahoos sitting in their van”, said one attendee.

No, of course not.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Deb permalink*
    October 25, 2009 9:55 AM

    @Kevin: Hey there, Beavis 🙂

  2. Kevin West permalink
    October 25, 2009 7:46 AM

    Ha ha. You said “euphemism.”

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