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The Machine That Goes "WOO-WOO-WOO!"

August 7, 2010

One of the things I admire most about those who go into science as a profession is the creativity and critical thinking required to advance us as a species.  I can think of quite a few scientific inventions that have increased our quality of life — the microscope, vaccinations, this — but sometimes a few of us wander off track, so to speak, and it behooves the rest of us to pull them back from the brink.  Because otherwise, you might find yourself strapped to one of these babies.

Speaking of babies, the previous link is the invention of a Dr. George Blonsky, who somehow got it into his head back in the ’60s that strapping an expectant mother to a gurney that rotated at neck-breaking speed would make the delivery of a baby easier.  Apparently influenced heavily by his mentors, the honorable Drs. Larry, Moe and Curly, it was his opinion that applying centrifugal force would loosen the muscles (not to mention several critical sphincters, I would imagine) necessary to extract the baby.

Those of you who are particularly sharp-eyed will note the considerate inclusion of an expertly-positioned net to ensure that the infant wouldn’t shoot out of the whirling birth canal, taking out several medical personnel in the process. You just can’t be too careful with that kind of thing.

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